New local dad, Brett Broadus has today graced social media with an adorable photo of him napping alongside his two-month-old daughter, Zara.

Despite the fact that his child has essentially not stopped shitting, crying or eating since they left the hospital in mid-May, friends of the Brett and his wife Mandy are under the impression that things are all good in the Broadus household.

While many paediatric safety experts have for centuries warned against co-sleeping with children under the age of five, it seems the grave dangers faced by Zara napping alongside her 90-kilogram father simply do not weigh up against how cute the photo is.

However, other dads in Brett’s social circle can see right through his vain attempt to look worthy of an infant’s trust.

“There is no way he is asleep” says Tim, Mandy’s best friend from work’s husband.

“What a load of shit. That kid can barely open her eyes yet, let alone sleep long enough for him to catch a few zs”

Close mate and second cousin Jack also refuses to accept the commonly held theory that Brett is able to sleep at the same time as Zara.

“What I went over their to drop off some old baby clothes the other day. That kid didn’t stop making noise for a whole two hours”

“If he is asleep then he is a really bad dad. Imagine if he rolled over?”




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