KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT
With less than three weeks until some tinned passionfruit begins to drip over your family pavlova, time is running out to finish your Christmas shopping.
Given we all have an effortlessly boring male in our lives who will demand a present whilst doing the bare minimum themselves in the gifting department, here is a list of pressie ideas for your stale husband, brother, fiancé or your bachelor cousin that hasn’t changed their Facebook profile picture in nine years.
Whilst the modern, inner-city male is more likely to drink rosé or yuzu seltzers in summer, years of memes about Peaky Blinders have convinced the greater male population that whisky is still a classy drink for scholarly men who’ve graduated from the University of Reddit.
As such, for only $29.95 you should pick up six granite stones or ‘Whisky Rocks’ from a quirky gift shop run by a woman that wears lots of bangles.
Does your man like sports? Probably yes. He also probably cycles between sleeping barebum in summer, or in whatever undies he went to work in during winter. As both options demonstrate disgraceful levels of hygiene, this Christmas gift him the PJs of his favourite NRL Team (Or AFL if he lives west of the Barassi line).
Bath Bag Gift Set
Are you tired of catching your fella using your $90 facial moisturiser on his cracked heels? Do you often find him rubbing your exfoliating glove on his nutsack? Swing by your local pharmacy and get him a bath bag set, complete with spray on deodorant, some 3-in-1 body wash, and if he’s lucky, a new loofah.
Pro Nutsack Shaver
Much like your expensive cosmetics, the bloke you share a house with has probably used your shaving equipment on his equipment at some point in the last 12 months. Therefore we recommend getting him a new “body trimmer”, which is marketing jargon for a fancy electric
shaver that won’t make his balls bleed next time he goes to trim the hedges on the pube lawn.