LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT
Professional and casual vandals alike are celebrating as a public sign featuring a bald real estate agent has provided them with the perfect canvas.
Along with politicians, real estate agents are one of the few occupations that hold onto the belief that a five year old photo of their rude head will help with their career, despite the fact most people would like to forget they exist when they don’t have to deal with them.
However, crumbs of comfort come in the unity of public signs featuring real estate agents and a black permanent marker.
Earlier today, local vandal Hamish ‘Egg Salad’ Sandle (17) came across the holiest of hooligan boons; a photo of a real estate agent who is as round and bald as an egg.
“Oh fuck yeah,” stated Sandle as he shook his marker with the excitement, while also buying himself some time.
“What do I want to go with? Maybe hair? A mohawk? A moustache? Hitler stache? Mullet? Goatee? Dart? Tatts? Piercings? Black eyes? Beaks? Kelly beard?”
In the end, Sandle decided to chill it with a classic and added but a simple vertical line at the top of the real estate agent’s head to make it look like a penis, with three drops of an indeterminate liquid coming out of the top.
“They could be urine or they could be cum. That is not for the artist to dictate rather it is what you, the viewer, choose to see.”
