After years of denying that life for detainees in Manus Island is anything but peachy, Immigration Minister has today been left red-faced.

This comes as the Australian government was been forced to pay $70 million in compensation to more than 1900 asylum seekers detained at Manus Island in a landmark deal thought to be Australia’s largest-ever human rights-related settlement.

Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull has today ordered that Peter Dutton roll up his sleeves and start paying the money back through a night job in the Parliament House kitchen, after years of insisting that the self-immolation happening in Island Detention centres was only the fault of the detainees.

Peter Dutton, who has only ever worked for the public service was reportedly disgusted by the Prime Minister’s suggestion that he work a real job as a way of paying back the $70m that Australian tax payers have just been stung with for human rights violations under his watch.

“It’s not my fault” he whined to Malcolm Turnbull.

“This all because of ambulance-chasing law firms that reckon asylum seekers deserve the same human rights as asylum-holders”

With the weekly wage of kitchenhands currently sitting just above minimum, at $694.90, it is looks as though Dutton will have to hold this job for another 193 years, that is unless he finds a way to blame labor for the atrocious treatment of refugees in Australian Government sanctioned island prisons.



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