Dangerous Levels Of Impulse Spray Detected At Local SUPRÉ Outlet
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
It's still unclear what could be causing the dangerous levels of Impulse Romantic Spark emitting from the change rooms of the North Betoota...
Local Account Manager Thinks He’s Indispensable To Multinational Employer
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
A local suitcuck at Lemonger DOBB's Betoota office has lashed out at claims made by some of his friends that he honestly 'doesn't contribute...
“Back In My Day” Meme Offers Portal Into Baby Boomer’s Abusive Childhood
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
Back in Sheila Corgan's day, men were men and women were women.
That's a personal mantra she's lived by her whole life and the...
Local man fires up BitTorrent for first time since the last GOT season
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
Because he's not made of money, a local student has blown the dust off the BitTorrent client installed on his late model MacBook...
Student performs riveting bass cover of Enter Sandman at Year 6 talent quest
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
An often misunderstood and underappreciated local 12-year-old blew the socks off his peers, teachers and family yesterday afternoon at the Hasbrook Road Public...
Bloke shows off items around room like bowerbird to impress one-night-stand
LILLY MULLER | Gossip | Contact
A harmless personal training professional found himself making small talk with another pleasant Betootanese youth as they clip-clopped up the...
Conservative father collapses shortly after learning son has septum-pierced girlfriend
PETER HORRACE | Local News | Contact
A Birdsville father of four has been flown to Adelaide after he collapsed late last night after learning...
Dad Gives Giant Telco A Piece Of His Mind By Abusing Overseas Call Centre Operator
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
A frustrated Brendan Simpson decided to bloody well tell this giant telco what he thinks of it this afternoon, by lashing...
Quiz: Do You Wanna Keep Talking Shit? Or Should Tyce Get His Older Brothers Down Here To Cave Your Fucken Head In?
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
Local families at the Betoota Arboretum and Recreational Reserve witnessed a minor verbal altercation today, as one of the young Adams boys decided...
Dolphins 4th Grade Captain Flees Australia With Club’s Rego Money
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
EXCLUSIVE
The Australian Federal Police have tracked down disgraced former Dolphins 4th-grade captain and club treasurer Lewis Karnava to the remote...
