All eyes are on Geneva as the most anticipated peace agreement since the Oslo accords are set to take place.

It was an emotional morning today as the United Nations finally triumphed in achieving an actual victory with the signing of a peace agreement between Barry Whitley (59) and the 3 teenagers who keep cutting his hose to make a bong.

The peace agreement mainly focuses on sharing the costs of the hose. The agreement also focuses on creating several agreements with the hose cutting procedure, including cutting the end bit, and not directly through the middle – which has caused huge unrest in the relationship previously.

After years of cat and mouse between Barry and the teenagers, he says it’s a relief to finally reach an agreement, and he hopes that lasting peace can hopefully come out of this.

“Yeah mate, it’s a relief, I was skeptical about flying half way round the world to sort out a dispute back home, but it was worth it,” said Barry.

The 3 unnamed teenagers involved say that although they don’t have much money on hand, between them they should be able to cover their side of the agreement.

“It’ll be nice to finally not have to argue between us whose turn it is to sneak into his front garden,” explained one of the boys.

The success of this peace agreement is a breath of fresh air for the United Nations.

“This is a huge win for us, people have been saying we are a pointless organisation which can easily be vetoed, but today we showed all the critics what the United Nations is capable of,” said the Secretary General of the U.N.


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