A local plasterer has received a stirring round of applause today, after managing to pull off an incredible achievement.

The subbie at one of our Old City District highrise construction sites has today finished sheeting an entire floor without hiding any bottles of piss in the walls.

The 42-year-old Dave McDonald managed to pull off the stunning play after simply just using the job portaloos downstairs for a couple of days.

“I did obviously go off the scaffolding a couple of times, but I made sure it didn’t rain down on any of the blokes below,” said McDonald over a happy hour schooner at the Royal Commercial Hotel.

“And let’s focus on the positives here, an entire floor, without a single bottled of piss in it!”

Like most other plasterers, Dave has a long history of pissing in bottles and stashing them away like little time capsules in every place he sheets – on the premise that it’s a pain to go down to the portaloo like most other blokes.

“It’s very annoying, but the foreman cracked the shits about me doing it on the levels below, so I kinda had to actually aim my dehydrated urine into the toilet rather than an old coke or Gatorade bottle.”

He then laughed at us when we asked why his piss looked like Apple Juice.

“Why do you reckon?”


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