Right-wing culture warriors in Australia have today been forced to update one of their favourite sayings after a historic evening in Ahmedabad.

Those who enjoy turning every single issue into a Left v Right game, and those who enjoying commenting on content made by those people, have been sent back to the drawing board on the old ‘Go Woke, Go Broke’ catchphrase.

This comes after Captain Planet Pat Cummins capped off an absurd year as leader of the Australian Cricket team – collecting a World Test Championship, an On Paper Ashes and an ODI World Cup.

That swathe of victories come despite Captain Planet taking a few hours out of his year to vocalise his opinions on issues which he thinks are important to him as a member of a democratic society that professes to love free speech.

Those comments from the man given the highest honour in the country, incensed plenty of boomers and people who spend to much time on the internet – who said that the bleeding heart leftie should focus on cricket before his woke attitude sent the Australian cricket team broke.

However, it seems like you can actually have an opinon on something and still be quite good at your job, with Captain Planet leading the boys to arguably the most successful year in cricket history.

“Yeah, it seems like going woke might not send you broke,” said a geriatric member of the 98th Keyboard Warrior Infantry division.

“All these wins have really taking the wind out of my sails.”

“It’s UnAustralian to be so woke, but it’s also UnAustralian to not get around a winning Australian cricket team.”

“It’s a frustrating situation to be in.”

More to come.


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