Police have issued a warning to all designated drivers today: Stay away from Nan’s Rum Balls.

The warning comes after a spate of DUI’s across the country, directly linked to consumption of the potent Christmas sweet.

Diamantina Police Spokesperson Troy Pisasale confirmed that over 50 people have returned positive breath tests during the Christmas period.

“I understand that people are just trying to enjoy themselves, but we are urging caution in regards to Rum Balls made by grandparents.”

“I enjoy the dessert as much everyone else. But, if you are driving and you consume them you will get yourself into trouble with the law.”

Head of The Betoota Country Womens Association, Marg Wilson told us that Rum Balls made by people over the age of 75 are dangerous.

“You see, Grandmas get to a certain point where they don’t care as much. I mean I pour most of the bottle of Bundy into my mix. It makes things more exciting.”

Betoota Ponds local Coen Ramsey said he blew over after a few Rum Balls yesterday.

“They had a serious kick to them. I thought, surely I will be right. But obviously not. Double Demerits fucking stings,” Ramsey said.

Pisasale said that while it is unfortunate, Police encourage the consumption of other sweets.

“I am aware that Fruit Salad is a very average dessert. But it will keep people on our roads safe,” he said.


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