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Though he doesn’t plan on doing anything too extreme on his upcoming holiday, a popular local tax accountant as purchased himself a GoPro to document his European odyssey with.

Speaking candidly to The Advocate in the lunch line at the Subway on the ground floor of our building, Colin Cresney said he liked the size and image quality of the camera – and that it made him look like a real adventurer.

“Which couldn’t be further from the truth!” he laughed.

“I’ve still got bad grommets in my ears which prevents me from even swimming. Despite that, I even let the smooth-talking young man at Harvey Norman talk me into buying a waterproof case! Anyway, I’m going to Italy, France and Spain for three weeks,”

“Doing the usual things. Eating, drinking wine, you know? I might even get some hoota. But yeah, I certainly won’t be throwing myself off any bridges or anything! I won’t be skiing with it, either. Don’t want to Schumacher my noggin!”

Paying with a fist full of coins, Colin joined our reporter in the food court to continue their chat.

However, much to the dismay of the other patrons in the food court, Colin unwrapped a footlong seafood sensation on white bread, complete with a double helping of melted English cheese.

“Jesus mate,” said one man from across the room.

“Can you take that shit outside? The fuck is wrong with you, cunt?”

Colin looked back at our reporter, who was already halfway out the room – dry heaving.

More to come.


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