Opposition Leader Bill Shorten has called his team into a huddle today.
The Australian Labor Party looking for all money like they will shit this weekend, have come together to try and figure out how it could possibly go wrong.
With the Coalition Government in tatters, after leadership challenges and ministerial resignations, political commentators have earmarked the ALP as the short odds favourites to storm home and win the election.
However, as in sport, with Bill Shorten at the helm, nothing is a given.
Blessed by fallout from the leadership calamities before him, Bill Shorten looks to have cemented his place at the head of the ALP table, and has called in his MP’s for a conference.
“Okay, so things are going swimmingly for us,” Shorten reportedly addressed the group with a beaming grin on his face.
“Is there any way we can still fuck this one-horse race up?”
At which point a few ministers pointed out that the only way it could all go pear-shaped is if Shorten decided to ‘get on the front foot.’
“Please Bill, just shut up. Don’t say anything. Just smile and nod, and allow the Libs to keep letting rounds off into their feet. They will win it for us,” one of the MP’s said.
Shorten agreed to keep quiet for the sake of the party.
“I haven’t really got anything to say anyway,” he laughed.
“They haven’t really been saying much about policy or anything, so I can’t just say the opposite of what they say””
More to come.
