21 July, 2016. 14:34

ERROL PARKER | Purple Monkey Dishwasher | Contact

GREG POON THREW CAUTION TO the wind on his 40th birthday and decided to buy a motorcycle.

Knowing full well that he could be turned inside out after even a minor accident, Mr Poon revealed he simply cannot wait until his liver gets a lashing from somebody else.

“Yeah moit, me liver loves Coopers and a bit of red every now and then,” he said.

“I only put red threw her if I want to make my wife look like a painter’s radio. She loves that gender-bending grape shit,”

“But come get ’em, first in best dressed. I’d feel bad for the cunt who ends up with my lungs, they’d look like garbage bags by now.”

Settling on something black and loud, Poon agrees that the switch to motorised two wheel transport will be permanent for him.

However, he agreed to donate everything except for his eye corneas and skin. The high-functioning autistic panel beater revealed to The Advocate that the thought of somebody walking around covered in his skin is “a bit full on” and he said in the event of his death, he wants his family to have at least something to burn or bury.

“Dunno mate. There’s a lot of questions in life. Like if you sucked off one of Oscar Pistorius’ stumps, does that make you gay? Or if some bloke ends up with my eye corneas, does that mean I can see with his eyes,” he said.

“And what’s stopping some pervert just buying my skin from the hospital and turning me into a drum or raincoat? No thank you.”


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