ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
Four of the sixteen members of a local WhatsApp group have seemingly hijacked discussion in the thread today, polluting it with a whole manner of NBA Playoff-related chat and content.
Dennis, Goblin, Mike and Peter form one-quarter of their group (which is entitled ‘Team Queef’) and typically contribute with the odd meme here and there – perhaps a slight ribbing of another group member is also on their ala carte menu of good times.
But all that has been thrown far from the car crash that is now their WhatsApp group.
“With each ping and pocket vibration, I feel compelled to check my phone. Even though I know it’s going to be someone saying something about the NBA playoffs,” said fellow member, Klop Stevenson.
“I get it, you’re excited about the sport and yay go team but seriously. It’s a constant river of shit nobody else in the group cares about,”
“Part of me wants to say, ‘Hey fuck boys, can you make another group for this NBA shit?’ but then chances are I’d be excluded from that group – which is a far, far worse outcome than just being subjected to four messages an hour. I digress, this is still pretty bad.”
Klop, whose hippy parents let him choose his name at age five, is not alone in his mild loathing of the NBA chat.
Harrison Taylor got in touch with The Advocate regarding this story originally – and he explained to our reporter that if he was the group admin, there’d be some changes around town.
“I like basketball as much as the next person. Why, I’ve even dropped five grams of mushrooms, an MDMA cap and smoked half a joint before heading in to watch the Townsville Crocs play before. I had a hell of a time,”
“However, that was on my own time. I really don’t appreciate this utterly selfish spamming we’ve got from the NBA fans in the squad,”
“We get it. You just happened to catch the arse end of 60 Minutes last Sunday and now you suddenly care about basketball. Like how my housemate, Pog, watched this Vox video about the best rappers of all time and then all of a sudden, the house had to listen to second-hand MF Doom for two weeks non-stop,”
“Just keep your interests and hobbies to yourself please.”
More to come.