Hailee Martin has rarely done well at Christmas.

Thanks to having one parent that was a science teacher and another who was a meteorologist, Hailee has a long history of unwrapping dorky dud gifts that have brought her zero joy.

Whether it was the telescope she got in Year 2 when she asked for a Polly Pocket, or the camping chair she got in Year 12 when she had asked for the new Dyson Airwrap, the 25th of December has always been a total let down for Hailee in the present department.

And now that inflation is punishing every corner of her extended family, Hailee’s clan has decided to run a Secret Santa with a $75 limit, a gift swap that will be run across the 14 people planning to come over for Christmas Day lunch.

So after suffering years of getting things she’s either regifted, donated to Vinnies or tried to flog on Marketplace, Hailee has reportedly taken destiny into her own hands and sent around a list of all the things she doesn’t want in 2023.

“Hi there, I don’t know who has me but here are some ideas,” Hailee shot into the family Christmas Whatsapp.

“I haven’t made a wishlist, but here’s all the things I don’t want, please take note…”

“No candles, no makeup, no magazine subscriptions, no ‘funny’ shirts or mugs. Don’t get me a waffle maker, a Just Jeans gift card or bluetooth headphones of any kind.”

“Also no books on dating, no olive oil sets, no kitchen gadgets or calendars, and if anyone gives me a voucher for a pasta making class I’ll strangle them with some fettuccine.”

“To be honest, I’d really prefer the $75 transferred directly into my bank account, don’t bother with a cheque because I don’t know how to bank them.”

“Thanks xoxo!”


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