WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | Contact

The Home Affairs Minister has made the call today.

After a horror few months, and with conservatives reeling after the most senior figure in the Catholic Church is now a convicted paedophile, Dutton decided today was the day Border Force let a boat through.

After his party tirelessly worked to avoid a royal commision into institutional sexual abuse, and many publicly supported the man who is set to spend the rest of his life in jail for sexual abusing children, Dutton told our reporters that urgent intervention was needed.

“It’s looking increasingly likely that I might be gone after this next election, and the government will be decimated,” said the Member for Dickson whose middle name is Craig.

“This is as dire as it’s every been, and I thought I’d seen the worst when I forgot how to count and through the entire political system into turmoil a few months ago.”

“I haven’t got any mileage out of telling people asylum seekers are going to take their spot in hospital this morning, so it’s time to get serious.”

“So I’ve told the boys to let one through.”

Dutton explained that Border Force weren’t initially that keen on skirting their duty to promote his political agenda, but eventually came round.

“Yeah, they were pretty firm on the fact that have moral and ethical duties above obligations to serve the best interests for me and the Nightwatchman, but I talked them around eventually.”

“I’m the captain,” said a Dutton.

“I’m the captain.”

“That’s what I told them, and they said they might let one through.”

“God knows we need it.”

“Hopefully it’s a big one crawling with asylum seekers.”

It’s not yet known if the boat has been let through.

More to come.

LEAVE A REPLY

Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here