Scotty Celebrates A Brief Distraction From His Woeful Jab Stroll Out
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
The nation's Head of Marketing is today enjoying a brief reprieve from shirking responsibility and hiding from the media.
This follows the historic...
With No Major Outbreaks, Tasmanian Government Struggles To Distract Voters From Housing Crisis
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
The leader of the island outpost of Tasmania has today revealed he kinda wouldn't mind a bit of an outbreak if he's honest....
ABC Hoping To Bring A More Chilled Out Vibe To Q&A After Naming Costa Georgiadis As New Host
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
I'LL TAKE THAT AS A REALLY COOL COMMENT: The ABC has this week had to confront the toxic brand of public debate that...
Annastacia Offers Olympic Organisers 7 Million Bucks To Relocate Tokyo Games To Townsville
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
The Premier of Queensland has today made another last-ditch pitch to snag a major sporting event.
Speaking exclusively to The Advocate via telephone...
Government Demands UNESCO Relabel Barrier Reef With Less Alarming “Goin Through Sum Shit”
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
The Federal Government has today revealed that they've gone all out on an international lobbying mission.
Not to secure more supply of crucial...
Report: You Have Well And Truly Fucked This One, Mate
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
With three major cities in lockdown tonight, a vast majority of the Australian population is currently unable to go to work, to earn...
“She Hates The Heat” Dad Still Stands By His Theory That The Virus Disappears In Summer
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
A local father of four has today offered up some hope for our flailing nation.
With over half the population in lockdown due...
Sharehouse Develops Own Weather System After Fitzroy Woman Overdoes It With The Indoor Plants
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
The Melbourne Suburb of Fitzroy is reporting one of the most incredible environmental changes in recorded history this week.
In a never-seen-before occurrence,...
Non-Essential Sydney Tradie Gives Wife A Break And Takes The Reins On Home Schooling The Kids
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
WHO WANTS TO TAKE ON THE CHAMP? Despite dreaming about this scenario since the first day of his apprenticeship twenty years ago, Yagoona-based...
Melbourne Extends Lockdown Citing Concerns That Sydney’s Stealing Their Thunder
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
The State of Melbourne has escalated a rivalry with an old foe today.
Speaking to the media this morning, Premier Dan Andrews announced...
