The State of Melbourne has escalated a rivalry with an old foe today.

Speaking to the media this morning, Premier Dan Andrews announced that his government would be extending the state’s lockdown for another 7 days.

The declaration came shortly before Melbourne’s arch-rival Sydney, announced another 78 new cases, with 21 of those still out in the community while infectious.

With Sydney facing the prospect of prolonging its lockdown again, Dan Andrews said the threat to his city’s title of the ‘Lockdown Capital Of The Country,’ forced him to act.

“Locking down is Melbourne’s thing,” said the leader of a state only just coming to terms with things like QR codes.

“And with the rampant spread of Delta up there, it seems like a jealous Sydney is trying to pinch that off us, just like they try and pinch all our sporting and cultural events.”

“So, if Sydney wanna let this thing spread, I’ll lock us down for another 7 days. And, if I have to, another 7 days. And another 7 days, and so on.”

“We are the consummate pros at couping up at home and shutting down people’s business,” said Dan Andrews.

“And we’ll go all year, so if Gladys wants to try and steal our thunder, she’s got another thing coming.”

More to come.


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