An impoverished university student has called in financial reinforcements this week, asking his family for a full tank of fuel for Christmas.

Broke, hungover and yet to squeeze a single piece of knowledge out of his $35,000 Arts Degree at South Betoota Polytechnic College, 22-year-old Aaron Wells has reportedly updated his family on his festive wish list.

During his routine weekly phone call to his mother, Mr Wells is said to have let his parents know, chipping in to fill up his 2003 Charade would be a true Christmas miracle.

“I love my parents but if they’re gonna pool all their money together to get me a gift, I’d love it to be something I actually need,” said Mr Wells.

“Last year, they even got Grandma involved and I walked away with a GoPro, it’s a lovely thought but honestly I had it on eBay by January and you don’t get much resale these days.”

“Nup this year all I want is something I’ll actually use, and 35 litres of E10 fuel and maybe a Frozen coke would be great!”

The request comes as fuel prices across the country continue to rocket towards $2 a litre, with financial analysts reporting it’s actually cheaper to fill your car with sparkling water from a waterfront Italian restaurant.

With oil prices soaring and a long list of NYE festivals in Mr Wells sights, the student has quietly confided to The Advocate that he hopes his rich Uncle will also get the memo.

“If the posh side of the family get involved then I could get even two tanks, that means I could almost get all the way to Brisbane for New Years.”

 “After a semester in Betoota, God knows I need to see some fireworks in the city.”

“No idea how I’ll get back, but the idea of torching my Charade in the outer suburbs and hitching a ride back through murder country sounds like a more pain free experience than filling up at the bowser at the moment.”


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