22 April, 2017. 15:34

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

Attending the GumNutterz Festival out on the Betoota city limits last weekend, Greg Portman was eager to shed the Tarocash uniform he’s forced to wear to work each day for something a little bit more befitting of his left-leaning politics.

Wearing cut-off jean shorts and a handsome, joyful and charming vest complete with oilskin gaiters – the immoral ensemble none the less offended his 68-year-old father who happened to stumble across images on his wife’s social media accounts.

“Stone the fucking crows, get a load of this shit,” said his cleft-palated Dragons diehard father, Gus.

“Look at what Greg wore to that fucking bush doof. He looks like he’s there to lift shirts and loiter around the toilets. Christ all-mighty. You know, you do all the right things as a father. Make him play private school contact sport and do a real degree like engineering instead of all this gender-bender Liberal Arts kids study now – and this is the product? Sad!”

The Advocate reached out to Greg for comment, but have yet to receive a reply.


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