In a plot twist that no one saw coming, engineers have reportedly surged ahead of tradies in the competition of who can get the most cooked at the work Christmas party.

For decades, tradies held the uncontested crown for the loosest chrissy parties in Australia, with feats of endurance that could rival the story of Sodom and Gomorrah. However, over recent years, engineers, typically associated with precision, calculation and non-existent social skills, have flipped the script, leaving their blue-collar counterparts bewildered and slightly impressed.

The shocking turn of events unfolded at a Christmas party organized by an engineering firm, where the traditionally subdued atmosphere took a detour after one member of staff that’s usually extremely reserved revealed he had purchased substances from Belgium on the dark web. Witnesses say that although the staff member in question was met with shock at first, it didn’t take long for others to take part.

“Julian usually doesn’t really talk much in the office, I actually always thought he was foreign to be honest, when he pulled out his dark web purchase in front of everyone I can’t deny, I was kinda keen.” Said Paul Scolley (31), one witness at the party.

It’s believed that several staff members continued the party at one of their private homes, with witnesses saying they could hear the sounds of nitrous oxide canisters being cracked and some heated debate on who was going to walk up the street to get money out of the ATM.

More to come.


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