11 September, 2015. 05:00


[dropcap]The Betoota Advocate[/dropcap] has today been informed that we are to expect an abundance of hate mail and offensive vitriol from the controversial Australian cultural activists known as Reclaim Australia.

The anti-Islamic “Aussie Pride” group has today urged tens of thousands of members to “troll” our humble small-town newspaper, after taking offence at several articles this week, including our weekly news podcast.

Speaking to VICE magazine today, the Grand-Wizard of the far-right organization, Shermon Burgess (a.k.a The Great Aussie Patriot) has stated that he believes The Betoota Advocate is a potential threat to the future of Australian culture.

“They may be a regional Aussie newspaper, but they aren’t true Aussies” said a notably distressed Burgess.

“They claim to be about Australian values and that kinda stuff. All they seem to do is take the piss out of groups like us,”

“They aren’t funny. They are fuckwits. They should consider themselves officially on notice.. This is WAR”

The Betoota Advocate’s Editor-At-Large, former ringer and landowner, Errol Parker has commented on the hostility.

“We never meant to offend these people. The last thing we want to be referred to is UnAustralian,”

“However, as members of a town that is predominantly made up of descendants of Moslem Afghan Cameleers and First Nations people, we do want to question some of their policies,”

“Clancy (Editor) is not a big fan of them at all.”

When asked for comment about the pending “war”, 5th generation-Betootan Clancy Overell, responded quite passionately.

“If these boys wanna G.O… Tell ’em to bring it on, Bunge.  Come out to the Channel Country. Ay!”

“Come out of the suburbs and try to tell us we aren’t Australian. The Betoota General Store has been 100% Halal since 1836,”

Members of the Reclaim Australia movement take to the streets in response to Mick Fanning's near miss in J-Bay
Members of the Reclaim Australia movement take to the streets in response to Mick Fanning’s near miss in J-Bay



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