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Police Called As Hundreds Of Dutch-Australians Rally To “Reclaim New Holland”

4 December, 2015 11:05 CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT About 100 heavily-armed police – with negotiators – in Melbourne’s CBD worked towards keeping a crowd of nearly 1000 Dutch-Australians calm during a "Reclaim New Holland" rally this morning. There was no violence in Melbourne, unlike the scuffles on Saturday at a similar rally in Brisbane and arrests at a rally between clashing protesters in Sydney yesterday.  At 11am the right-wing anti-Anglicisation...

Australia Enjoys Another Peaceful Day Under Oppressive Gun Control Regime

Due to the nation's controversial and oppressive gun restrictions, no one has died as a result of a mass-shooting from an automatic or semi-automatic weapon on Australian soil today, for the 8499th day in a row. North Betoota cinema attendant, Christina Upton can't believe it has been a whole 23 years, 3 months and 8 days since a heavily armed white...

Obama Takes A Break From Climate Summit To Enjoy French Winter Sun

2 December, 2015 10:05 CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT PALOMA PAGE, France —  Over the next two weeks, 30,000 diplomats and delegates will labor to hammer out a new global pact that would, for the first time, commit nearly every country on earth to enact new policies to reduce their planet-warming greenhouse gas emissions. However, one of the biggest international names to attend the...

New Office Employee Begins Search For ‘420-Friendly’ Co-Workers

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Benjamin Harvey, a newly hired graphic designer at Corporate Signage Australia, has embarked on his low-key yet persistent search for fellow employees who may share similar interests to him. "Brisbane is boring enough as it is. I only just moved here and I need to know where 'my people' are at," says Mr Harvey with a sinister grin. "In an office of 45...

Corey Worthington Treats Bride With Surprise Hilltop Hoods Performance

1 December, 2015 11:45 CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT AUSTRALIA’S ultimate teen party boy Corey Worthington has grown up into a respectable young man. The 24-year-old millionaire put on a beautiful "Australians-in-Bali" themed wedding for his young bride, Mel Borg (28) over the weekend. Worthington, an Australian household name, shot to fame after throwing an out-of-control party when he was just 16 in Melbourne....

‘The Fat Jew’ Is Painfully Not-Funny, Confirms Person Who Met Him In Real Life

30 November, 2015 14:45 CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Josh Ostrovsky, aka ‘The Fat Jew,’ rakes in six figures from his joke-sharing Instagram account and has recently landed several sponsorship deals. As a controversial figure in the world of internet humour, it is assumed by many that The Fat Jew is the current 'face' of contemporary comedy. However one man, who has actually met...

Young Man Remarkably Less Alert Two Days After Stereosonic

30 November, 2015 10:10 CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT 21-year-old Gosford-based electrician, Luke Fordham, says he is very glad that he took today off. "Oh boy, am I tuckered out!" says the young man, between episodes of South Park, as he lies in a prone position on a couch in parent's garage. Luke says his current state of emotionally sensitive slovenliness is a direct result...

Older Female Coworkers Brief Intern On Rescue Signals Ahead Of Law Firm Xmas Party

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The 22-year-old receptionist at Sydney law firm, Ogilgemer-Maher, is a having a really good day. As a recent university graduate, Annabelle Rockham says she finally feels comfortable in her entry-level position at the 100-person strong Martin Place office. "I've been here for about four months and since then I had only had a couple conversations with co-workers who weren't delegating...

Local 4-Month-Old Gives Mum Clear Consent To Post 450 Photos Of Him Online

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT 4-month-old, Jack Peachey, has given clear consent to his mother posting upwards of 450 photographs of him on an array of social media channels, it has been confirmed. The consistent stream of baby photographs are also captioned with generic motherly proverbs, such as: "Jack William Peachey, a Sagittarius... and he knows it!" "NO! I'm the boss! lol" "Oh, this boy of mine," "When's...

Online Retailer Surprisingly Not Hijacked By Gay Market

Story via Business Insider 24 November, 2015 16:45 CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT It is amazing that Australia's largest online retailer has not been completely hijacked by the ever-growing international gay market. That's according to a new report released by the Business Insider yesterday. The iconic swimwear company, known locally as Budgy Smuggler, is well known for their iconic "Banana Hammock" style male swimmers. However, their product appears...

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