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ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A study has found that a pair of red p-plate slapped onto an Audi A1 has been found to be one of the key indicators of having a daddy that is not a fan of Federal Treasurer Jim Chalmers. The study's findings have been published today by the nation's peak scientific body, the CSIRO, after...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The rat people of Sydney will have to wait a little longer for some proper airborne hospitality after low-cost carrier Bonza announced it has no plans to service the place in the near future. Sydney is the nation's largest market and home to a harbour that's widely considered to be the southern hemisphere's largest open-air...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Opposition leader Peter Dutton has blasted the Federal Government's move to double the superannuation concessional tax rate for people with a balance of over $3m. "It's an attack on everyday, beach house-owning Australians," said Mr Dutton in Canberra this afternoon. "This reckless move by the Albanese Government will decimate the boating industry in Australia. It will...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The Betoota Heights Coles has a meat bandit and he's become a hero to the community this week after the big two supermarkets posted record profits on the back of the cost of living crisis. Speaking to The Advocate under the condition of anonymity, the meat bandit said he was raise a good Catholic and...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT A local father of three has today explained to The Advocate his frustration with the new government. Speaking to us from the coffee shop in one of the neighbouring cafes to our newsroom, Graham Wallis said he's already had enough of this 'virtue signalling bullshit.' "It's just too much," explained Graham. "I mean, publicly elected officials going out...

RORY SALAZAR | Finance | Contact The sweet scent of lavender has this morning wafted across the nostrils of primary school teacher, Lauren Goss (33), as she replaced the bin bags in her kitchen. The sweet scent comes after Goss and her white collar boyfriend, Patrick Clompers (34), made the happy realisation that being a two-income household is pretty fucking awesome. Despite the increasing financial pressures...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT A run of the mill white collar guy from our town’s very own Betoota Ponds is today preparing to depart the real world.  Albert Johnson, who is described as a ‘just a regular guy’ by his friends, family and intimate partner, is reportedly set to become a smuggler for the better part of the next 48 hours, after purchasing...

KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT A local Dribbler has gone a little rogue in the snacks aisle this evening, as he attempts to cure his case of February blues. With the BBL wrapped up, the Aussie UFC card done and dusted and no live Rugby League yet on the TV, local bloke Jayden Minto told The Advocate that his entire existence seemed...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact One of the forgotten victims of Treasurer Jim Chalmer's proposed super tax reforms has broken his silence, telling The Advocate that his very way of life is under threat. The boat-owning, hobby farmer explained that the government is moving the goal posts. "You can't just change the rules like that," said Martin-Bertram Bertram-Martin, a semi-retired financial...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The boss of Australia's favourite airline has today moved to hose down any silly questions from the nation's reporters. Alan Joyce has quickly assured the public not to get any funny ideas after Qantas posted a record $1.4 billion half year profit. "Don't be stupid, Qantas doesn't pay tax," laughed the man who raked in a $23.9 million...