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WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT A young German woman has today been heaped with praise, after managing to achieve the impossible. 23-year-old Stephanie Rahm has made headlines after making it through an entire week in Bali without getting naked in public once. What's more, Stephanie didn't even flash a single person for the duration of her stay. The miraculous achievement comes after months...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Troy Buswell, the disgraced former Treasurer of Western Australia, has blown the conch of Vasse this morning to herald his intent to run in the Rockingham by-election triggered by the resignation of Premier Mark McGowan yesterday. A dull tone was heard over Bunbury just after 11am this morning as the one-time premiership-hopeful took a...

RORY SALAZAR | Finance | Contact It is understood the practice of chiropractic therapy is the most complex medical science known to man. No one understands this better than Lake Betoota-based Chiropractor, Dr Brent Tredlam, who owns and runs Rawness Energy Chiro clinic downtown. Dr Tredlam even told the Advocate this very fact while fingering our reporter’s spine as we laid face down on a...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Chairman Mark McGowan, the defacto leader of the Democratic People's Republic Of Western Australia (DPRWA), has reportedly died of exhaustion this after according to the hermit kingdom's state media outlets. He was 145-years-old. DPRWA media has said Chairman McGowan grew tired in his lifelong battle against East Coast imperialists and passed away in his sleep, which...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT NSW Blues Coach Brad Fittler has today taken things outside the box in preparation for the State of Origin series opener. With the first game just over 48 hours away, the man in charge of the underperforming Blues has decided to mix things up. Ahead of a captains run tomorrow that will feature none of the original squad...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT Popular morning television host David Koch has today confirmed that he will be standing down as the host of Sunrise. The long time host of the Channel 7 program made the announcement live on air this morning, shocking viewers of the program who apparently thought he would go on hosting the show for ever. The notable face of...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A French Quarter barfly remarked to our reporter this morning that he finds it nice to see kids putting their phones, tablets and PlayStations down for a change and deriving some fun from the great outdoors. When asked what he meant by that, 79-year-old day drinker Max Near-Ross said he was referring to those kids...

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT Betoota local Daniel Nagy has learnt his friends always thought he had a rude head ever since he shacked up with his conventionally attractive partner. As an Australian heterosexual man, Nagy and his friends never pay each other compliments while sober, so he never thought it was odd that his friends have never confirmed if they find him attractive...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT "What's fucking wrong with ya?" Those were the words ringing down Angus Bell's phone line this afternoon. "It's one o'clock on a Friday afternoon, what the hell are you doing," laughed Angus's long term friend and pest Ben Thomas. "Close ya laptop, and get to the fucking pub. Whatever shit you are supposedly working on can wait till Monday."...

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT Third year carpentry apprentice Talumn Chadley (19) has made it clear he is showing up to his backup career by wearing training shorts to work. Currently doing a bit of backline work in the extended reserve grade Under 19s squad of the Betoota Dolphins, Chadley started his apprenticeship because anything pays better than reserve grade bush footy. According to Chadley,...