FRANKIE DeGROOT | News | CONTACT
A house on the outskirts of East Betoota’s Pebblecrete Belt was reduced to rubble on Tuesday after local stoner Brad “Big Hoff” Hoffman foolishly ignored the microwave popcorn bag’s clearly written warning to not reheat unpopped kernels.
Neighbour Daisy Marshall, 78, said the blast rattled windows and caused irreparable damage to a wind chime. “I was ironing some tea towels when there was this almighty boom” said Daisy. “At first I thought the grandkids had arrived, but then it started raining carpet tiles and X-Box games. That was when I realised that the young man next door must have tried to reheat some leftover popcorn kernels. What a duffer!”
As well as destroying the house and a bus stop, the blast also caused $65,000 worth of damage to a park bench, which was later repaired by the mayor’s brother-in-law.
Big Hoff, miraculously uninjured, was found wandering dazed and confused in the street, which close friends described as “sad” and “normal”.
Managing Director of the Grandma’s Recipe Homemade Popcorn multinational conglomerate, Bruce Harrison, said the event served as a timely warning for people to always pay close attention to instructions and warnings. “I just don’t understand why people continue to risk their lives by trying to reheat unpopped kernels; it says not to do that right there on the bag”.
