WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
As the nation and the world deals with the fallout from the spread of this shiny new spicy cough variant, our Prime Minister has fronted the media to try and score some easy points today.
Facing the cameras of a fatigued and weary nation, Scotty from Marketing has revealed that ‘we won’t be returning to lockdowns’ as a result of the whole Omicron thing.
The comments come as the World Health Organisation warns about the seriousness of the latest mutation, and frantically tries to get a read on how to handle it going forward.
Despite lockdowns not being his call to make, The Prime Minister then took the opportunity to chat some more populist rhetoric about freedom and moving forward in an effort to attach himself to the social and economic resurgence of the nation heading into election time.
However, while he has made the big statement on a potential new crisis, the nation’s Premiers and Chief Ministers have reportedly just sighed.
“Whatever,” explained one local State leader today.
“He loves coming out and telling us what to do when the consequences don’t affect him”
“None of us listen to him anymore”
“Imagine if we did”
“If he wants to help out, he can contact the pharmaceutical companies to ensure that we’ll be supplied with adequate booster shots as soon as possible.”
“But that probably sounds too much like hard work.”
