Commonwealth Games competitors residing at the athletes village have today come out in frustration of the games’ cyclists taking over the village cafe and hogging all the copies of The Courier Mail.

Athletes say that their morning routines and mental preparations are being ruined as the cafe is completely over run with lycra-clad cycling groups, all vying for the limited copies of QLD’s prestigious Murdoch publication, The Courier Mail.

The close knit groups only spoken words to others – apart from “a half shot of decaf and not too hot” – is leaving other athletes fed up.

“Are you reading that?”

Approaching tables, in a seemingly poor attempt to look less desperate than they are to get their hands on the prized rag, these words are delivered complete with a face full of sweaty junk.

It is believed that with influx of lycra-wearing grown men and women on the Gold Coast this week, not one cafe on the Gold Coast has been spared from their cultural practice of smashing coffee in large noisy groups.

“It’s like a horror movie. all buzzing around” said one Jamaican pole vaulter.

“You sit anywhere near a paper and there right on you. Am I reading that?”

“Does it look like I’m reading that? Get ya nuts outta my face!”


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