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***This article contains spoilers about Euphoria Season 2, Episode 9***

With war and floods taking over the baton for this year’s fucked up topic, a female heavy office has managed to take a reprieve from all the doomsday talk, by heavily discussing the latest Euphoria episode every Tuesday.

It’s alleged that every woman arriving into the office this morning had let out an ‘OMG’, as they delayed work to chat about theories, and bemoan about the fuck ton of loose plot lines creator/writer/control freak Sam Levinson has left behind.

As they’d all rushed home the day before to determine if fan favourite Fezco would make it and how badly Maddy would beat the shit out of Cassie, the office was reportedly the most animated it’d been all year – with half the noise being nothing but inaudible wails.

“Why did the singing go on for so LONG?” 

“That and the goddamn funeral scenes, like how many times do we have to hear Rue talk about her dad?? I know it’s a crucial part of her character but damn, like we GET IT.”

“I’m so glad Faye stepped up, but Ash Tray is like a feral animal. It was so sad and unnecessary,” 

“I LOST IT.”

“I’m just glad it wasn’t Fezco or I’d stop watching.”

“I love Fezco so much, I just want him and Lexi to live on a farm and have kids. He’s honestly the only likeable character.”

“Yeah I was on Lexi’s side but that carousel scene was PERSONAL HAHA.”

Collapsing into a fit of giggles, the girls lament trying to work out what will happen to Fez next and if he’ll get his happy ending – causing the only bloke, Duncan, to question what was going on.

“Who’s Fezco, is that even a real name?”

“Is this a crime drama?”

More to come.

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