RORY SALAZAR | Finance | Contact
A revelation has occurred in a Betoota Heights shopping centre this morning, one that could solve the cost of living crisis once and for all.
In the massive shopping centre structure, if a consumer walks up the northern escalators and into quadrant G4 on the map, they’ll find themselves entering the centre’s key anchor tenant, Skinners.
Betoota’s very own supermarket giant, since its humble family-operated corner store beginnings Skinners now competes with the Big 2 for monopoly control over the population’s food supply.
The Advocate spoke with Skinners CEO and third generation owner Greg Frank about why it appears his business is price gouging locals with mark ups on prices of at least 500%.
“You’ve heard of inflation yea?” Frank looked down his nose at us and huffed.
“You get that costs go up when things are more expensive right?” The man asked what appeared to his second rhetorical question, with an intonation to suggest he was sick of explaining the obvious.
The Advocate offered that many of the marked up products had not in fact risen in cost 500%, and that some had even lowered in cost over the last few months compared to what they were a year ago.
Looking at us like we’d just farted, Frank said: “My family’s been doing this for a while yea?”
The Advocate did not respond because you don’t respond to rhetorical questions.
Our reporter pressed Frank on the fact that clearly his company was taking advantage of the food monopoly they enjoy in the region, and implied the obscene price mark ups were an example of shameless corporate profiteering.
Frank’s face went tomato red.
His arms quivered and he exploded with anger.
“Fine! Yes we’re capitalising on the situation and taking profits, fuckwit. It’s called Capitalism yea? Besides, it’s not our fault if customers are willing to pay these prices.”
“We wouldn’t raise prices so bloody high if they refused to buy them,” he said in reference to food staples like bread, milk and vegetables.
There you have it.
With those words the supermarket giant found both the problem and solution behind high prices.
Us.
All we need to do is stop buying food.
Simple.
