TRACEY BENDINGER | Culture| CONTACT
Betoota’s top drug dealer, Jyleigh Barron, has been elusive to local police for the 10 years. Always seemingly 2 steps ahead of them. That was until he bought himself a ten-year-old BMW M3.
It isn’t this particular car that gave Jayden away, it was the fact that he decided to apply a matte finish to the exterior of the vehicle – which, in police circles, is the calling card of a drug dealer.
Speaking to the Advocate earlier, Constable Aramayo gave a top line explanation of how matte finish cars are what utes are to tradies.
“Well, I don’t know the particular science behind it, but I believe it has something to do with the dealers being able to easily clean their products off the car bonnet”
“I should confirm that with our lab though.”
“Either way, we’ve got that Jyleigh now.”
For reasons we don’t wish to disclose, the Advocate has managed to form somewhat of a close relationship with Jyleigh and we were able to uncover his legitimate reason for getting a matte finish.
“It’s just fucken sick, bra [sic]”
When asked whether he was concerned that it was a literal beacon for police he responded
“I’d like to see those pigs catch me.”
At the time of writing, Jyleigh has not yet been arrested by Betoota’s law enforcement. Sources close to the investigation revealed that they’re waiting for him to commit some kind of misdemeanour before they choose to arrest him.
More to come.
*** Newsflash ***
Sydney Eastern suburbs glitterati up in arms over BYO plastic bags.
Following the lead of major retailers, Coles and Woolworths, local Eastern suburbs drug lords have gone green and require their customers to bring their own bags.
Lucinda-Lee, a married bored Double Bay housewife said it was “ridiculous”. She was already very busy with her art classes, bamboo basket import business in Bali and taking her twin girls to ballet so having to somehow find a reusable bag for her Friday night nose candy “me time” sessions was too great an imposition.
Darrell* a well known local supplier at the Woollahra Hotel said he was doing it for the environment and his customers would understand.
*not his real name