LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT

Exercise loyalists at a Betoota gym have noticed a fresh face amongst the gym equipment this winter, leading them to the conclusion that the poor bugger must have recently gotten dumped.

According to the frequent attendees of Betoota Fitness and Mirrors, an unidentified fella has started attending the gym with a January like intensity despite the fact it is winter, the time where no logical person can really be fucked going to the gym. 

The exception to this rule however are those who have recently rejoined the single community either by choice or in 99% of gym cases, by being dumped.

“Seriously, he’s always here. I’ve never seen this guy enter the gym and I’ve sure as shit never seen him leave,” stated one gym attendee who may or may not have taken a Bumble profile photo inside this very gym.

“I genuinely think he must have gotten divorced or something, he really goes at it, no headphones or anything.”

Although it can be accurately assumed that the unnamed gym junkie has lost the love of his life, pundits are unable to say for sure as who the fuck just starts talking to a stranger at the gym.

“It’s not a sobriety thing either, I’ve seen him polish a XXXX at lunch down the road.”

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