LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT
A local bachelor has got his dog ready to mingle with one of those custom leash attachments that clearly states the name of his pup, thus making it easy to roll off the tongue of local dog park hotties.
Like many young men, Cohan Gleeson (33) realised that dog parks are kind of like the real life Tinder, with jokes about swiping and dogs that are too offensive/predictable to publish here.
For that reason, Gleeson decided to get his hands on a four-legged wingman who would help him win the hearts of dog park singles/console him when he inevitably returns home alone.
Needing a name that was cute and unthreatening, Gleeson named his goofy little sod ‘Bertie’, a name that Bertie is now forced to wear proudly, unaware he is named after show bag chocolates.
“Bertie, shake,” stated Gleeson at the dog park, proving how his dog was ready for networking events with a nametag and a firm handshake.
“Good boy Bertie! He talks too, see; what’s that Bertie? You want me to ask this girl for her phone number?”
At the time of writing, Gleeson has received zero dates from this strategy because what sort of creep tries to meet someone in real life anymore.
MORE TO COME.
