Sports

Local Man Googles “Rugby Union News” After Reading Entire Daily Telegraph

24 September, 2015. 12:50 IMRAN GASHKORI | Sports Editor | Contact Thomas Hadden, 27, says he is shocked and appalled that he has been forced to google the keywords "Rugby, Union, News" after reading the most circulated newspaper in Australia. Despite the fact that the Wallabies have just played their first match of the olympiad international Rugby Union World Cup, Mr Hadden was forced to...

Bieber Surprises Aussie Fans, Arrives A Week Early For Bulldogs Fan Day

16 September, 2015. 15:45 CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | Contact Beliebers, rejoice - global superstar Justin Bieber has returned to Australia for a secret finals fan day at Belmore Oval. The Canadian singer, who is set to take over the iconic Sydney waterfront for a live concert on Wednesday next week, has arrived a week early to show support for his favourite National Rugby League...

NRL Clubs Rush To Sign Rising Young, Quite Obviously Problematic And Anti-Social, Star

IMRAN GASHKORI | Sports Editor | Contact As The National Rugby League enters the opening rounds of finals footy for 2018, many clubs are looking back at an unpredictable year that was. A few early bursts of talent and a few semi-finals flops that no one saw. With that kind of inconsistency across the board, it is not hard to imagine why both the current contenders...

Shane Watson honoured with touching video: “15 minutes of incompetence”

7 September, 2015. 14:56 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact THE PERENNIAL EXPERIMENT has come to a conclusion - one many Australians knew the answer to years ago. Cricketing journeyman Shane Watson announced his retirement from all forms of Test cricket yesterday morning. He joins a long list of brilliantly talented players of the short game who failed to conquer the Test...

Wests Tigers Board Begs Rabbitohs To Merge Into Joint Venture

7 September, 2015. 11:10 IMRAN GASHKORI | Sports Editor | Contact One of the NRL's youngest clubs, Wests Tigers, have today asked yet another Sydney-based Rugby League franchise to join their combined venture. The independently appointed chairperson for the Wests Tigers board, Marina Go, has said that the South Sydney Rabbitohs have been given the option to merge forces with the Tigers brand,...

Boat person from Ukraine could be the new Shane

27 August, 2015. 15:45 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A UKRAINIAN NATIONAL has escaped off-shore detention and had his protection visa immediately approved after customs officers witnessed the man "rolling an orange out of the back of his hand". Immigration workers have been on the lookout for potential sporting talent as the stateless and war-wearing asylum seekers continue to pour over...

Dustin Martin Defends His “Houso War Dance”

25 August, 2015. 10:10 IMRAN GASHKORI | Sports Editor | Contact Richmond Tiger’s midfielder Dustin Martin has vowed to fight the AFL’s investigation into his two-fingered salute towards Collingwood supporters with the “Goodsie defence”. During Collingwood’s 91-point fingering by the Tigers last Sunday, Martin gave the Magpie’s supporters a couple extra digits to think about, after copping three-quarters of consistent abuse from the...

People are going apeshit for Jarryd Hayne around the world

24 August, 2015. 15:05 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact PEOPLE AROUND THE world are going batshit crazy for Jarryd Hayne today after he made three great punt returns in a game against the Dallas Cowboys yesterday. From Minto to Maine, the Hayne Plane has captivated the world with his journey from one of the greatest rugby league players of all time...

Parramatta Eels still have a chance of making finals, says Stephen Hawking

19 August, 2015. 11:16 NRL SPECIAL REPORT | Contact | At the request of Parramatta coach Brad Arthur, theoretical physicist Stephen Hawking has successfully proven that the Eels can still mathematically make the NRL finals. “I was staring at the ladder during the week, crying, when all of a sudden I saw something in the numbers” said Arthur. “So I gave the boys the day...

Survey finds Australian backpackers now identifying themselves as Kiwis

17 August, 2015. 15:06 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact AUSTRALIAN BACKPACKERS ARE now twice as likely to identify themselves as Kiwis while overseas, according to a recent survey conducted in London this month. Buoyed by the recent sporting successes and social advancements from the land of the long white cloud, swathes of young Australians are opting to bend their vowels and relax...

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