Rural Firies Draw Straws Over Who Has To Put On The Fucking Santa Suit
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | Contact
You know you've got a tough job when you can spend the twilight hours of a Sunday morning rushing into a burning building...
“Yeah This Bracelet Looks Nice” Reckons Boyfriend In Market For Last Minute Gift
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet Reporter | Contact
Local man Liam Williams has fucked up again.
A young plumber and boyfriend has once again waited until Christmas...
Dad Answers Question With 10min Explanation When A Simple Yes/No Would Suffice
TRACEY BENDINGER | Society | Contact
The town's leading historian, Nigel Walker (65), couldn’t contain his excitement this morning when his youngest son, Dilan (18),...
Bloke Prepares Himself For Annual Christmas Eve Fight Down At The Bottom Pub
DYLAN FEINGOLD | Fighting | Contact
There will be many sore heads tomorrow across town but not all of them will be from the grog.
Returning...
Local Biscuit Enthusiast Thoughtfully Leaves Orange Creams For Someone Else
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
"It's not like I don't like them, it's just that they're my least favourite biscuit in the tray," he...
Premade Airport Sandwich Somehow The Worst But Most Expensive Sandwich Local Man Has Ever Had
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
Despite owning a three-piece suit, one local salesman claims to have enough taste to enjoy the finer things in...
New Study Attempts To Understand What Type Of Human Drinks Southern Comfort
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
People first noticed Gary Turtledick wasn't normal in high school.
He'd routinely mouth off at teachers, even as a relative...
Paralegal Binging On Double Blacks About To Reminded Why She Stopped Drinking Them
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | Contact
Heading to a party in the French Quarter this evening Sara Milad, a 22-year-old legal graduate decided to make...
Beach Town Tourist Overwhelmed By Choices At Local Takeaway Shop
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
"I'm looking at the works burger," he said.
"With chips and few calamari rings. And a potato scallop. Oh wait,...
Tailender Plays Another Majestic Straight Drive Through Third And Fourth Slip
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet Reporter | Contact
False confidence is a trait that can often be found in cricketers.
It’s far more prevalent in park cricketers...
