The Parramatta Eels are reportedly considering just doing illegal performance enhancing drugs and waiting to see how long it takes them to get caught, after the club slumped to a eighth straight loss, and sixth of the 2018 season.The Eels remain at the very bottom of the NRL ladder after their atrocious loss to a 18-2 loss to Canberra at GIO Stadium on Saturday night.

It’s not a good look for the limping Western Sydney club that was tipped by many to finish in the top four this year, after several relatively good signings and the salary cap shit in the rear view.

“I, mean. They could just load up on roids and see if that helps” says one long suffering fan helping himself to the wet lunch buffet at the leagues club this arvo.

“I don’t think the fans could be anymore hurt than they are now”

“Like, why the fuck not. At least we’d get to see some wins on the board. That’s if steroids can even help them at this point”

With their chances of making the finals having already been pushed through the crematory, the Eels say they are now planning for 2019 and have several other big-name targets ready to finish their careers at their club.


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