Local 1st-year carpentry apprentice, Sebastian, has today committed an immortal sin by vocalising the fact that he has no idea what the fuck any of the blokes of the jobsite are talking about.

During a roaring Friday arvo smoko break on a new low-rise job in Betoota Heights, the workmates of this Tik-Tok-aged youth find themselves doing what they do best: quoting American movies that were released three decades ago.

“Wait what?” asks Sebastian.

“What do you mean when you say ‘Mister Mister’ in that squeaky voice?”

“Also, I don’t understand it when you say ‘you’re gonna die clown!’ – what TV show is this from?”

His foreman, Mario, fills him in.

“You know… That Adam Sandler movie”

Sebastian cocks his head, even more confused.

“Happy Gilmore” says Mario.

Sebastian shrugs.

“Never heard of him”

The entire jobsite goes quiet as every tradie present begins to do their math in their head and try to recall how old they were when they first watched this spectacular comedy film.

“How old are you again Sebo?” asks Glenn, the 40-year-old landscaper.

“17” responds the apprentice.

As someone who is deeply entrenched in the Generation-Z cohort, it should come as no surprise to any of these ageing tradesmen that Sebo is unable to recognise any of the references they are making to a sports-comedy film that was first released nearly a decade before he was born.

In fact, he’s so young he doesn’t even know what ‘sports-comedy’ means. They don’t make movies like ‘Cool Runnings’ or ‘The Replacements’ any more.

But still, if the young fella had a bit of respect he would just nod along until he gets home to ask his old man about all these jokes he’s clearly missing.

Sebo remains inquisitive as his every tradesman seated on a milk crate within 50 metres of him sighs with the overwhelming epiphany that they are merely grains of sand filtering through the terrifying hour glass of time, rapidly hurtling past their peak and into a purgatory of cultural irrelevance.

“Shut up mate” says Mario.

“Go and do some fucken work”


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