ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

Federal Health Minister Greg Hunt says the government decided to tell Pfizer to go suck eggs because many superfunds and indeed politicians have CSL shares, which means the country as a whole would’ve been better off.

Mr Hunt went onto explain that CSL had agreed to make the more-effective Astro Zucchini jab here in Australia, which means the company would become more valuable and in turn, better for all Australians.

“Ah, um. Ah yeah,” said Mr Hunt this morning in Canberra.

“You see, Australians like say, uh, Dave Sharma the Member for Wentworth. He’d. uh, just purchased a boatload of CSL shares before we made the announcement that CSL would be making the jab here. Like many other Australians, it’s a very common thing among all Australians to purchase vast amounts of blue chip shares out of the blue like that. Anyway, we wanted to make country better off so we decided to go with the AZ because it would be made by CSL,”

“Much the same as like how, um, Dave bought a large amount of Qantas shares before the Federal Governemnt amount the $750m support package for airlines. Uh, he declared everything, it’s not like he’s hiding anything. What I’m trying to say is that a lot of us are in the same boat as Dave. Mum and Dad investors investing in great Australian companies, we’re only doing our part as the government to make sure business and industry is strong in Australia, now and forever,”

“Ok. Uh, thanks, uh, guys.”

More to come.


Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here