Victorians are believed to be growing worried that today’s spike up to 31 new cases in Greater Sydney might result in the NSW lockdowns being extended to the point where they will no longer be able to demand sympathy for what they went through last year.

This comes not even a week after Victorians were reportedly getting upset that the situation appeared to improving in Sydney, with many claiming at the time that Sydney deserved ‘at least a taste’ of what they went through in the 17 different lockdowns.

However, with a consistent and growing number of cases being reported each morning, it might look like Sydney might be getting too much of a taste of state government lockdowns – an outcome that may possible take the violins out of Melbourne’s hands.

Twenty-seven of the new NSW cases are linked to known contacts, and 17 of these cases were household contacts. This means four of the new cases are under investigation.

NSW Premier Gladys Berejiklian says 13 of the new cases were in the community while infectious, which is bad new for Sydney – but apparently even worse news for Victorians who are worried about losing the title of the longest-suffering patriots.

Speaking to a rockabilly thruple from Fitzroy’s beatnik Northern end today, The Betoota Advocate got a good insight into the troubling victim complex that is deeply engrained in Melbourne’s white middle class.

“It’s like, yeah, you can’t help but feel good that Sydney now knows that even THEY are capable of fucking this thing up” says Polly Saigon (38, muscle car photographer).

Her co-dependent, Briony Letterscotch (34, rose quartz jewellery repairer) agrees.

“Yeah it’s good that they realise it’s not just Dan’s fault. He tried really hard but Victoria got let down by everyone else”

Our reporter then asked the thrupple to now explain what their newest beef was, considering all the joy this lockdown gave them earlier in the outbreak.

“Well” says third companion, Presley Gosford (29, rifle barrel cementer)

“The different is… When we did our lockdown, we were doing it for ALL of Australia. Not that we got thanked”

“But Sydney is only doing it for themselves. You can just tell”

“They have no idea what we went through”


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