The Morrison household will not be steering into any conversations about anything except state of Origin and the AFP arresting bikies tonight, as it becomes clear to the Prime Minister that the rest of the Canberra news cycle might make his wife question his moral compass.

The PM has been quite open in the past about how he needs to ask his wife for some clarification on how he should feel about the mistreatment of vulnerable people.

An unresolved allegation of rape within Parliament House in March triggered a yet to be implemented cultural and structural review of the way ministers and staff deal with workplace sexual assault, with Prime Minister Scott Morrison quick to bring up that he had to ask his wife what she thought of the whole thing.

“Jenny and I spoke last night, and she said to me, ‘You have to think about this as a father first. What would you want to happen if it were our girls?’” he told reporters at the time.

“Jenny has a way of clarifying things. Always has.”

It’s for this reason that he’s going to spare Jenny Morrison any questions about the 3-year-old girl currently lying in a ICU bed in Perth hospital, after developing a blood infection after suffering from pneumonia for ten days while detained on Christmas Island Immigration centre.

It seems the horrible treatment of Tharnicaa Murugappan has been so brazen that even Scott Morrison realises that his government would be found guilty of human rights violations if they had been detained anywhere except his out-of-sight offshore prison.

The critically ill Australian-born toddler who has spent her entire childhood behind bars in a series of Australian immigration facilities because of a clerical error surrounding her family’s bridging visa. She last made headlines when she lost all of her baby teeth prematurely due to the malnutrition and lack of sunlight provided in her tortured existence as a scapegoat for Peter Dutton’s racist dog whistling.

“Soooo….” Morrison said this afternoon, while trying to make conversation with his wife that doesn’t involve his populist and xenophobic policies that have allowed this family to remain indefinitely detained at the cost of 90 million taxpayer dollars, all in the name of winning over rednecks that are probably going to vote for Pauline anyway.

“So Jenny… What was I going to say…”

“Oh yeah that’s right!”

“Was listening to some Tina Arena on Kiss FM earlier. Haha gosh she’s a good singer”

“But I tell you what, that Kyle Sandilands has a filthy mouth. I can’t believe he’s allowed on the radio!”

“I just can’t condone exposing children to that kind of nonsense… He really is trying to appeal to the lowest common denominator”


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