Anyone who thought Scotty From Marketing may have been out of his depth as a Prime Minister has today been proven wrong, because law and order is back on the front page.

The disgraceful Hawaii holiday, bungled jab roll-out and his outright refusal to take responsibility for Federal quarantine centres and the aged care binfire is no longer a reluctant talking point for the pro-government Australian media.

In fact, we’ve completely forgotten about the alleged rape of one of his own employees in a Parliament House office not even 100 metres from his own desk.

The many questions surrounding Cabinet Ministers wilfully engaging in political corruption and pork barrelling with sports rorts and Murray Darling water theft is also a thing of the past.

Because yesterday, the Prime Minister learnt that more than 100 members of underworld have been arrested in the nation’s largest-ever crime sting.

While this impressive three-year collaboration between the Australian Federal Police (AFP) and Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI) was obviously so sensitive that no cops worth the guns on their hips would let this Liberal Government anywhere near it – they haven’t been able to stop the Prime Minister for taking complete credit for their result.

The mere fact that the government wasn’t mentioned once yesterday when this story first broke in the major mastheads suggests Scotty From Marketing moved quickly to organise an hour-long press conference where he played stage MC to the people who actually pulled this off.

With the AFP Commissioner today revealing that some of the most evasive criminal masterminds in the country were completely unaware that they were being tracked by law enforcement agencies, it is very safe to say that they also kept Scotty From Marketing out of the loop until the operation was complete – knowing full well he would have spilt the beans early for a sugar hit of the political points he is now chasing in today’s euphoric press conference.

Again, this has stopped that PM and his extremely loose and leaky ship of a cabinet from taking full credit of the operation today, in an an attempt to pivot this entire operation into an election campaign.

“Congratulations to the AFP” said Scotty From Marketing.

“I always knew they had it in them to catch these bad guys, after I told them what to do and how to do it, of course”

“I would’ve love to have thrown on a vest and arrested some of these bikies myself, but unfortunately I promised Jenny and the girls that we would go to laser tag over the weekend.”

“I am sure Australians are fair-minded, and understand that when you make a promise to your children, you try and keep it.


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