Dream Job Listing Finishes With ‘Must Be Fluent In Mandarin’
EFFIE BATEMAN | BRISBANE| CONTACT
Marginally skilled white-collar worker Kylie Morely can’t seem to land himself a job.
The down on her luck graduate says she’s spent a solid...
Clinical Depression Miraculously Cured After Woman Told She Could Have It A Lot Worse
EFFIE BATEMAN | BRISBANE| CONTACT
A clinically depressed local woman had reportedly been unable to leave her bed, after again seeing the world for what it really is....
Woman Flying Regional Airline Just Can’t Help But Visualise Tiny Two-Propeller Plane Crashing
TRACEY BENDINGER | Culture | Contact
“I know it’s the last thing I should be thinking about when I board the plane, but it’s literally all I think about,”...
Long-Term Boyfriend Gives Up And Just Opts For Novelty Anniversary Gift
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
A local boyfriend has today saved himself the time, money, and stress that comes with a big-ticket anniversary gift and just decided to...
Supermarket Treats Essential Workers To 2 Drink Voucher Chrissy Party At Shit Local Irish Pub
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
A local store for a giant Supermarket chain has been commended for lavishing it's overworked and lowly paid employees this weekend.
The Betoota...
Chassis Of 2001 Honda Civic No Match For 5000 Watt Subwoofers
EFFIE BATEMAN | BRISBANE| CONTACT
A 2001 Honda Civic has today fallen victim to a deadly combination of a 5000 Watt Subwoofer and a dubstep track, it’s reported.
Though...
Creative Torn Between Spirit-Crushing Freelance Gigs Or Soul-Crushing Corporate Gig
EFFIE BATEMAN | BRISBANE| CONTACT
As local bloke Lucas Peyton painstakingly cuts together a four minute promo video for a childcare centre, he begins to wonder if the...
Seriously? This Local Kiwi Doesn’t Own A Single Basketball Singlet!
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
In some breaking news from our French Quarter today, a local man from across the ditch has revealed he doesn't own a single...
Santa Recommends Kids Ask For Sturdy Presents As COVID-19 Forces New Slam-Dunk Chimney Delivery
FRANKIE DeGROOT | Local News | Contact
As Santa alters his regular procedures to accommodate social distancing, children are being advised to choose sturdy presents that will survive the...
Mothers Group Sent Into Turmoil As New Mum Announces She Might Not Bother With Sleep Training
EFFIE BATEMAN | BRISBANE| CONTACT
A new mum has unwittingly committed a huge social faux pas, after casually announcing she plans to skip sleep training, it’s reported.
Natalie Pryor...
