People Pleaser’s “No Stress” Roughly Translated To “The Last Fucking Thing I Need”
STACY OAKSHEAF | City News | CONTACTSelf-proclaimed people pleaser, Sarah Jenkins, has been caught in a linguistic conundrum. Her frequent usage of the phrase "No stress" holds the...
Gen-Z Coworker Either Has Bladder Problems Or Is A Slave To That Fruity Vapour
STACY OAKSHEAF | City News | CONTACTConcern has arisen in the office as speculation mounts regarding the frequent disappearances of young intern, Jessica Vanders.
Colleagues have observed her on-edge...
Local Bloke Helps Wife Prepare House For Guests Coming Over By Cleaning The Shed
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactA local bloke has thoughtfully helped to prepare the family home for guests this week, by spending roughly two hours painstakingly cleaning and...
Spotify Wrapped’s Taylor-Heavy Winter Months Reminds Woman That The Break Up Wasn’t That Long Ago
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactA new feature of Spotify Wrapped has today cruelly reminded a local woman about her failed relationship, by offering some brightly packaged snapshots...
Local Irishman Wonders What Those Fooken Orangemen Want With Being Up On That Roof There Like
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
An Irishman who recently arrived in our cosmopolitan desert community has been left scratching his head as to why...
“You’re Always On Your Phone” Says Bored Girlfriend 2 Minutes After Running Out Of Battery
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactLetting out a small pout as her phone flickers to black after three hours of mindless Tik Tok scrolling, Clara Symes lets out...
Sydney Rental Market Forces Man To Consider A Boarding House Like He’s Going To Fucking Hogwarts
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACTA Betoota born-Sydney based man is having a quarter-life crisis tonight as he scours the internet in search of a new...
Clothes Shopping Much More Peaceful Now That Gen-Z Employees No Longer Bother With The ‘Hey Babe’
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactMajor introvert Darcey Boyd has found herself having a blissful shopping spree this week, with reports she was able to spend more than...
Indian Restaurant Owner Name Drops 1980s State Cricketer Who Regularly Dines Here With The Family
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
Located in the centre of the Old City District dining precinct, Betoota's most famous curry joint GET IT INDIA has a lot to...
Small Town Crim Uses Airbnb To See Which Places Are Free To Burgle At The Moment
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
A local burglar has used malignant short-term leasing app Airbnb to search for homes that will be vacant this...
