ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

The Prime Minister has told reporters that he’s had a gutful of state premiers putting themselves before the national economy.

“It’s just plain selfish,” said Scott Morrison this afternoon in Sydney.

“We’re just trying to get back on our feet and people like Dan Andrews and Annastacia Palaszczuk are just taking the piss out of me. First there’s Dan, putting curfews on the great people of Victoria for no reason at all. Then you’ve got Annastacia keeping her border shut because it’s a key election issue,”

“South Australia’s government has gone to shit. Tasmania has, too. Mark McGowan’s being needlessly cruel to a great Australian in Clive Palmer. In the Territory, who knows. They’ll be OK, they always are,”

“And that’s it. Every other state is doing a good job.”

When a reporter from the ABC raised their hand to ask a question, Scott could only sigh.

“Ah yes, I see the Australian Bolshevik Council has another question,” said Scott.

The reporter asked why the Prime Minister felt the need to criticise every state except New South Wales, which almost blew up this week because The Nationals felt ignored.

“I’m not here to throw barbs, I’m not here to play politics. I’m here to serve Australians and get us through this.”

He then closed the press conference, telling everyone he had a date with a Great Norman [sic] beer.

More to come.


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