As the Australian Open gets set to wow middle-class people for the 56th consecutive year, the nation is shocked by what they have learnt about these elite athletes in the lead up to this tournament.

Men’s world number one Novak Djokovic is one of several Australian Open competitors whose recent antics are proof of something we’ve long suspected but couldn’t say for sure.

Turns out, tennis players might just be massive sooks.

“I guess the culture of racquet smashing and yelling at adjudicators was a warning sign,” stated local tennis fan Vincent Wall.

“Nah but there are plenty of tennis players who don’t go on like a pork chop. I can think of…some…for sure…give us a sec…”

Despite the fact he is participating in a global sporting event Djokovic & a few of his fellow competitors are not happy with his living conditions as a hotel guest in a city that was shut for 7 months last year.

Although he is getting to do what he loves in front of a global audience in one of the best cities in the world, Djokovic is demanding better food and more training hours despite being literally the best in the world at this specific activity.

In a statement released by Djokovic, he stated he ‘was not sending a list of demands but suggestions’ and if people don’t believe him he will ‘hold his breath and stamp his feet’ until they do.


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