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The NRL judiciary has tonight handed down an entirely fair and reasonable decision, suspending the entire Cronulla-Sutherland outfit for this weekend’s game against the Warriors. 

The decision comes after the club embarrassed itself last week against a similarly positioned Knights team in the race for the finals.

Even as they were destroyed on the scoreboard, the Sharks did their best to destroy a couple of Knights players, including superstar Kalyn Ponga.

Chad Townsend had already been suspended for the hit on Ponga, but the rest of the team looks set to join him now.

The head of the judiciary commented explained that; “Dog shots on a fullback are worth a penalty or a sin bin sure, but the way the Sharks turned up from the opening kickoff? An absolute disgrace.”

“All 17 suspended for next week, and they’re lucky it’s not for the whole season.”

Sharks coach John Morris said the decision was “fair enough” and that he had considered just calling up a local 3rd-grade team to play in this week’s matchup anyway.

“Yeah we were hot garbage last week,” Morris continued.

“We’ll just have to hope the Warriors find a way to screw it up against our Reserve Grade and we come away with the two points.”


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