ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

In a decision that’s even left English cricket fans scratching their heads, English Test cricket captain Joe Root won the toss and elected to bowl yesterday in Adelaide.

Not satisfied with his answer, Australia’s peak scientific body has taken it upon themselves to find out why.

Speaking candidly to The Advocate this morning via fax, one CSIRO researcher said that they as an organisation always endeavour to find answers to some of life’s most challenging questions.

“Well basically,” he said.

“We had it up on the telly at work as we just went about our usual business. You know, trying to cure cancer and make super-efficient solar panels and shit like that, yeah? Ok well when Joe Root said he was sending us in, he had us all fucked as to why,”

“Tactics aside, you always bat first. I mean, I’m a terrible sportsman, which is why I’m a scientist. But even I know you send a team in first if you win the toss.”

The study is expected to last about a week or so.

The Advocate reached out to the English cricket team executive for comment but have yet to receive a reply.

More to come.


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