Bondi Junction’s Rebel Sport outlet have today revealed they are now completely out of all Sydney Rooster’s scarves, as Sydneysiders try their very best to make scarves a thing in the NRL.

After years of trying to pretend they were from Melbourne, the core community of sports fans in Sydney’s Eastern Suburbs have had to come crawling back to their fourth choice, the Sydney Roosters.

Their first choice, The Sydney Swans AFL side, or as they like to call them ‘the swahnnies’ is no longer an option – after Geelong snatched the club’s finals series with a 59-point upset win over them.

With the full time result of 15.8 (98) to 5.9 (39) – It is also the Sydney Swan’s lowest score since round one, 1997.

The local union side, the NSW Waratahs had a finish to their season that wasn’t much different, only they had that kind of score every single match.

“I guess it’s back to the sleeve tatts and closed fist punching” said one weary Elizabeth Bay resident.

“Oh, it’s a shame. I was really getting into the bloods this year. That Budgy Franklin is a true talent”

“I spose it’s not that hard to cheer for the Roosters as well when you’ve got players like Sonny Bruce Williams and Wayne Pearce playing”

The surrounding Westfield has also seen a sharp increase in wheat grass smoothie sales, as well as Dead Sea hand moisturiser.

“It’s these half-hearted Swans fans” says Westfield CEO Frank Lowy.

“Why can’t they get around a real sport, like Association Football!”


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