6 August, 2016. 16:03

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

WHEN THE OFFER FIRST CAME across coach Darren Lehmann’s desk, he laughed and said it might teach them a thing or two about the golden rule of cricket.

Following their day-four-English-style batting collapse yesterday in Galle, the Australian cricket team was offered the changed to star in an upcoming advertising campaign for optometrist chain Specsavers.

The nationwide campaign is expected to roll out in time for Australia’s home series with South Africa this summer.

“I think it’d be good for them. Seeing their faces all around town with the, ‘Should’ve gone to Specsavers’ print under it. It might put some fire back in their belly,” said Lehmann.

“We’re about to get towelled up properly by Sri Lanka, which is a bit crook if you ask me. It’s not that they’re a bad cricketing side, it’s just that we’re better. Simple as that. If we play like a bunch of blind men against the Saffas, the Cricket Australia board will have my legs broken,”

“So yeah, fuck ’em. They’re going to put Usman’s face 60ft high beside the F1 down in Sydney. It’ll be pissa [sic].” he said.

Another image to feature prominently will be the toilet Nathan Lyon smashed to bits with his Kookaburra after being dismissed as the nightwatchman.

Not since Glenn McGrath scored 61 runs against New Zealand at the Gabba in November 2004 has an Australian cricketer been invited to take part in a national advertising campaign.

The catchy ‘I went to Specsavers’ campaign that championed McGrath’s heroic innings is held next to the Qantas ‘I Still Call Australia Home’ and Big Kev’s ‘I’m excited!’ national advertising campaigns as being the greatest ever.

More to come.


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