LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT

A local dad has realised his son will be as average at cricket as he is after witnessing his boy’s absolutely woeful efforts at bashing a piñata. 

Originating from Mexican party traditions, piñatas are decorated capsules containing lollies that are to be smashed open by a blindfolded person so as to free the treats inside.

Piñatas are often designed to look like things kids will like which makes them popular with parents who wouldn’t mind seeing Elsa or Bluey cop a few whacks to the face.

Unfortunately for Betoota dad Wayne Deacon (36), the piñata resembling his son’s favourite Paw Patrol character remained intact, unlike Deacon’s dreams of being the father of the next Tendulkar.

Considered the world’s most prolific batsman of all time, Sachin Ramesh Tendulkar captained the Indian cricket team, earning himself the same sort of respect as India’s cultural icons and civil rights heroes.

With that in mind, it seems ridiculous that Deacon would ever put such secret pressure on his six-year-old son, even with his own failed cricket aspirations in mind.

“It was like watching a dog trying to buy something online,” stated Deacon, who’d added some whiskey to his tea to help calm himself down.

“I showed him how to hold the bat correctly and everything. He just swung and swung at the air, the slowest swings you’ve ever seen, even by baseball standards he’d’ve been out.”

“Then when he finally hit something it was the side of the verandah and he didn’t even chip the paint.”

“Kids are meant to be our future man…”

Deacon then muttered something about plan B before shopping online for child sized cricket balls.

MORE TO COME.

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