Despite the fact that the ‘ongoing conflict’ in Gaza has been on the news for her entire life, one

Like many of the noisiest social justice warriors on Twitter, Breah Coburg (27) lives a charmed life working from home, as a part time human interest journalist full time digital content freelancer.

This means this bleeding heart little French Quarter leftie has plenty of downtime to attach herself to the social causes she sees Chrissy Teigen posting about online.

But unlike these celebrities, Breah has more depth to her activism then simply signing petitions to ban ‘fast fashion’ and sharing John Oliver take-downs of Donald DRUMPF!

She understands, better than most of the bogans in this culturally cringeworthy nation of rednecks, the very real social issues that exist in her own backyard.

For example, Breah knows that referring to the colonial infrastructure of Melbourne’s CBD by it’s traditional Indigenous title of ‘Naarm’ is key to closing the gap between black and white life expectancies.

She also knows that dedicating a couple hours marching through Betoota’s main street on Invasion Day is her obligation as a white ally that wants to justify spending that afternoon drinking seltzers and keying ketamine at a ‘low key get together’.

In fact Breah takes her commitment to decolonisation so seriously that she even drops a Welcome To Country in her work email signature, in case any of the Malaysian airtaskers she corresponds with want to know that she knows about black stuff.

However, when it comes to meeting performatively woke checkpoints online, there is one chink in Breah’s armour.

It’s this whole ‘Israel thing’.

Without any high-profile celebrity crushes taking the lead on the violent dispossession of Palestinians currently taking place in Gaza, Breah is gonna swerve this pressing socio-global issue altogether.

“I just don’t know” she says, as she frantically scrolls past video footage of airstrikes.

“It’s all so complicated”

“I just wish I knew more about [this 100-year-old process of imperialist land theft that has been taught in Australian schools since the 1980s with far more enthusiasm than the colonial settlement of our own country]”

“I might just tip toe around this one” she says, as she mentally detaches herself from the growing death toll on the West Bank.

The plight of West Papua also sits in Breah’s ‘too hard pile’ – as someone who regularly enjoys the highly Instagrammable luxuries of an affordable Indonesian villa.


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